How to Open a Package of Cheese in 10 Easy Steps!

And now, an I'm Just Saying Rant:

I am aware that saying things were easier when I was growing up will jettison me into that category of adulthood usually reserved for grandmothers who reminisce about trudging through 10 feet of snow on their 10 mile, uphill hike to their one-room school, but who cares - some things WERE easier when I was younger, like opening a package of cheese.

Twenty years ago, blissful cheddery delight could be yours in just 2 simple steps. But now, it's not so simple. It took me several seconds, along with my kitchen scissors and a paring knife, to fight my way through the plastic origami shrouding my 8 slices of Havarti!

And it's not just cheeses that have gotten this special treatment. Those crazy plastic molds that encircle everything from computer cables to baby monitors require someone with weapons training to open them.

So, I beg of you manufacturers to stop the madness! My mom and dad - both aging Boomers - will soon be entering a time in their lives when they'll no longer be able to wield the necessary box cutter or hacksaw required to open up these plastic pods, which means I'll be getting telephone calls to come and liberate some object of their desire from its plastic fortress of solitude, or push their Zantac pills through those irritating pill cards, or peel back the foil from that bottle of Motrin.

I'm just saying!